Monday, August 2, 2010

Love is ...

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude:It is not self-seeking, nor easily angered.
It keeps no record of wrongdoing
It does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth. 
It always protects, trusts, hopes and preserves.
There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, hope and endurance.
In a word, there are three things that last forever: Faith, hope and love;
But the greatest of them is all love."
1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

Love is meant to be beautiful. But now the question is, how long can you maintain the beautiful feeling, flying butterflies in the stomach whenever your sweetheart looks deep in your eyes or calls your name, the sweet comforting and praising words to your partner? One month? Two months? Six months? Two years? I think a couple is lucky enough if they were able to do it until they cross one year before it all diminishes. What my friends told me when I started my relationship was all true: Enjoy the loving and happy feeling while you can. Enjoy being a new couple. Enjoy the honeymoon period, so they say. As when it's all over, it won't come back. So once all these up-in-the-air feelings are more or less gone, what would happen?

To me, love complements two different souls. Love appreciates each other. Love accepts all flaws and many imperfections. Love forgives mistakes. But it is HARD! It is so much harder than thinking the love definition in my way or typing the words down here. Too many things in life erode love. It needs real good and constant works between two individuals to maintain a happy ending like those always told in almost every fairytale: The prince and princes lives happily ever after.

Story of YK and CT

Let's keep the love alive!

My fiance and I are technically, emotionally and geographically in two different worlds. Most of the time, to make our worlds circle in one orbit, we quarrel, get angry to each other, criticize, throw tantrums, endanger in short cold wars and too many other bad things to list here. Different nationalities, upbringings, cultures, educational backgrounds, faiths, languages, work fields, interests, hobbies, characters and habits, to name a few, do help lit sparks and pepper bad mood in our relationships.

For instance, HE likes cars, gadget, technology, rock music, sports. SHE likes shopping, fashion, make ups, love ballads, flowers and lazing around the house. It takes a real shower for him to accompany her to shop her clothes, browse her make-ups and do her face or hair or nails in salon. She gets really bored when she has to go for car test drive, checks on the latest mobile phones or goes to computer shop. He likes to play loud macho music, but she enjoys quite and serene moments. He likes to goes for supper until late and she likes to keep her beauty sleeping clock very routine. We both are just too different.

So what do we do? Ideally, we must learn accepting each other's needs and appreciate each other's interests. We should sacrifice our selfishness and support our partner's interests. Without a doubt, to work this differences out, it takes a lot of adjustments and patience. Everyone gives and takes a little and a lot.

Unfortunately, I am still way far behind from my fiance for being a good love partner. I am lacking of all the good virtues to loving my better half as mentioned in the above quote. I find it difficult to manage my anger, emotions, selfishness, disagreements, faith and trusts. All this while, I thought I was always a very patient, calm and quite wise person. Turned out, I am just a pure immature and short-tempered individual. I often lit the fire and add oil onto it to create a bigger fire for no apparent reasons, vague delusions or uncertain fears and jealousy. True enough, age does not justify maturity and we are always the hero in our own story. That's how we hurt our partner.

Love is ain't an easy business. The outline of my current big project for my relationship includes trust, patience, appreciation, understanding, faith and respect. My big project sounds simple but is actually not easy. I practice to remember them but I tend to forget to practice them too.

"There are three things that amaze me - no four things, that I don't understand: 
How an eagle glides through the sky,
How a snake slithers on a rock,
How a ship navigates the ocean,
How a man loves a woman."
Proverbs 30: 18-19

I always now how much you love me, Darling!

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