Thursday, October 16, 2014

Remembering You

This afternoon, a blog reader sent me a very touching article about Baby Loss Awareness Week (thanks, Joyce!). This article speaks my mind as well as the battle that I went and am going through very loud. While I'd previously heard of Baby Loss Awareness Week, I never actually bothered about it. Well, until Dylan's incident happened to us. Honestly, sometimes, it still feels a bit surreal to me to be part of the 'grieving parents club'. No parent intends to sign up for this 'club'. But the truth is, like it or not, I am now part of it.

If I get the info correctly, Baby Loss Awareness week takes place from October 9th-15th every year. It is the week when bereaved parents, family members and friends commemorate their babies who had gone too soon.

I guess I am a day late in honouring this week but would like to do so, especially since baby loss is traditionally deemed as a taboo topic for many people or cultures. To me, baby loss is not a taboo affair nor a talk that will bring anyone bad luck if discussed openly. Acknowledging a baby that a family once lost is indeed difficult but it is very important. It is simply hurtful for the parents when their departed baby is not acknowledged or never spoken of. Just because some people never got to meet that baby physically, it doesn't mean that he/she never existed. That angel was very special and had left tiny footprints that are forever not erasable in his/her parents' lives.

Fly high, angel.

To my son in heaven whom I never held in my arms,

It's been a little over two months since you flew away.

I still cannot fathom why I was not given the chance to raise you.

I have, however, accepted the reality that you were destined for something bigger up there.

Just wanted to let you know that you were once my child and will always be my child.

With love,


Remembering Baby Dylan. 62 days today.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

First Sunday School

Last Sunday marked Naomi's first Sunday School, although she came incredibly late and only attended it for the last 30 minutes or so.

Naomi was late for her very first Sunday School because (1) I could not exactly find the classroom where the Sunday School was held. From afar, I didn't see any door opened in the Sunday School area where I was told the week before. Therefore, I confidently assumed there was no Sunday School held last Sunday and proceeded with bringing Naomi along to the Sunday Service as usual. (2) I felt that Naomi was considerably quiet and okay during last week's sermon so I refrained myself from bringing her to the Sunday School's classroom as yet. Naomi going to the Sunday School for the first time meant me accompanying her to the Sunday School the whole time too, hence missing the sermon.

Anyway, after the sermon was concluded, I looked at my watch and hey, there's like 30 mins left before the Sunday Service was over so I decided to bring Naomi to check the Sunday School place with my friend (her kids were already joining the on-going Sunday School).

12 October 2014: Naomi's First Sunday School.

When we arrived to the Sunday School's classroom, there were about 8-10 kids and they were generally older than Naomi. The kids were doing some craft things with the Sunday School teacher and Naomi being the youngest in the class was notably the most ding-dong kid of all. She didn't understand what the teacher said nor instructed the kids to do. As such, I did Naomi's crafts for the day - cutting and pasting the paper. While Naomi seemed not to have any problem meeting the new kids, she was more interested in exploring the classroom and couldn't really sit still doing her crafts.

That day, the kids were taught about sharing but ironically, Naomi totally refused to share the raisins that were given at the end of the Sunday School when her Dad asked for some. Amount of lesson taken? None. Clearly, Naomi needs to attend Sunday School more regularly and this coming Sunday, I will make her attend the 8am Sunday School as punctual as we could.

On another note, I spotted a really simple and easy to remember bed time prayer for kids written in Naomi's first Sunday School material. For someone (fingers pointed at myself) who needs to learn teaching a toddler how to pray in English, I found this useful. The bedtime prayer goes like this:

"Dear God, I've been busy all day. 
Thank you for being with me. 
Please stay with me while I sleep. 

So, I, too, learnt something new at the Sunday School.

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Featured in BabyTalk Malaysia Magazine's September 2014 Issue

Almost forgot to document here that my article on my 1st versus 2nd pregnancies was published in this month's BabyTalk Malaysia under "Bump to Birth - 9 Months" section. I was honoured to be given 3 pages for my writing this time around.

Find me in September 2014 issue.

Too bad, my name as the author of this article was not printed and this story only got published when Baby Dylan is no longer around.

Still, I am privileged to see that the magazine picked me again.